Hi, non-offending pedophile here. I appreciate your willingness to take us seriously, but I do have some broad disagreements.
1. One misconception you seem to be under is the current status of media sexualizing children: in the US, at least, this material is already legal and widely available. Art is not illegal until proven virtuous, and so the relevant question is not, "does this material reduce the risk of offending?" but, "does it *increase* the risk of offending?" Nobody has ever demonstrated that it does. On this subject we're not asking for anything but to be left alone.
2. Another point: while pedophilia is a risk factor for harming a child, this does not imply, nor has it ever been demonstrated, that we're more prone to rape than anyone else. It's probably true that a straight man is more likely to rape a woman than a gay man, but this does not imply that it would be dangerous to leave a straight man alone with a woman, and a straight man would not be wrong to be offended by that claim.
3. Let's say you like sci-fi movies. A friend comes over, sees you watching one and freaks out. "You don't actually believe all that, do you?" they say. Your response is of course, "What are you talking about? It's just a movie." And they say, "You can't just seperate fantasy from reality like that! Thoughts, beliefs, and emotions all impact each other! If you watch too many movies about alien invasions, you'll inevitably end up as one of those cranks claiming to have been abducted!" So you repeat, "what the hell are you talking about?"
That's how I feel about your insistence that my sexual fantasies must somehow be causing me some internal torment. I'm fine, really. It's way easier than you think to seperate the two. How have I accomplished this amazing feat? I don't know. How can you watch movies about flying saucers without disconnecting from reality? How can I play Dungeons & Dragons or listen to rock & roll without becoming a Satanist? Do I need to be able to answer these questions before it's possible, or are you making some false assumptions about how my mind works? You write, "to me, fantasizing about someone other than my husband violates my morals about being committed to my spouse with my whole self," but that's just how it works for you. My parents had the rule "look, but don't touch" and they've been happily married for 35 years. Why do you get to set the rules for everyone else?
4. I wonder: are you under the impression that we want 12 year olds in a bikini on billboards advertising beer? That's not the future I have in mind, and I've never gotten the sense that's what my fellow perverts want. I can respect not wanting to expose children to the sexualization of them and would be fine with such material being treated as intrinsically pornographic, regardless of how much nudity there is.
Hi, non-offending pedophile here. I appreciate your willingness to take us seriously, but I do have some broad disagreements.
1. One misconception you seem to be under is the current status of media sexualizing children: in the US, at least, this material is already legal and widely available. Art is not illegal until proven virtuous, and so the relevant question is not, "does this material reduce the risk of offending?" but, "does it *increase* the risk of offending?" Nobody has ever demonstrated that it does. On this subject we're not asking for anything but to be left alone.
2. Another point: while pedophilia is a risk factor for harming a child, this does not imply, nor has it ever been demonstrated, that we're more prone to rape than anyone else. It's probably true that a straight man is more likely to rape a woman than a gay man, but this does not imply that it would be dangerous to leave a straight man alone with a woman, and a straight man would not be wrong to be offended by that claim.
3. Let's say you like sci-fi movies. A friend comes over, sees you watching one and freaks out. "You don't actually believe all that, do you?" they say. Your response is of course, "What are you talking about? It's just a movie." And they say, "You can't just seperate fantasy from reality like that! Thoughts, beliefs, and emotions all impact each other! If you watch too many movies about alien invasions, you'll inevitably end up as one of those cranks claiming to have been abducted!" So you repeat, "what the hell are you talking about?"
That's how I feel about your insistence that my sexual fantasies must somehow be causing me some internal torment. I'm fine, really. It's way easier than you think to seperate the two. How have I accomplished this amazing feat? I don't know. How can you watch movies about flying saucers without disconnecting from reality? How can I play Dungeons & Dragons or listen to rock & roll without becoming a Satanist? Do I need to be able to answer these questions before it's possible, or are you making some false assumptions about how my mind works? You write, "to me, fantasizing about someone other than my husband violates my morals about being committed to my spouse with my whole self," but that's just how it works for you. My parents had the rule "look, but don't touch" and they've been happily married for 35 years. Why do you get to set the rules for everyone else?
4. I wonder: are you under the impression that we want 12 year olds in a bikini on billboards advertising beer? That's not the future I have in mind, and I've never gotten the sense that's what my fellow perverts want. I can respect not wanting to expose children to the sexualization of them and would be fine with such material being treated as intrinsically pornographic, regardless of how much nudity there is.